Dear Everybody, You Can't Steal My Culture!!

So everyone's read this article by Sierra Mannie“Dear White Gays: Stop Stealing Black Culture” I've been wanting to start writing again and after reading several posts on the subject I thought I'd add my two cents. I won't get into deciphering the whole article. It was an editorial written to a very specific market that ended up going viral. It was also someone's expression of their personal feelings of hurt and anger which it is not my desire to quantify or judge. I would think the main purpose in such an essay is simply to say, this is how you make me feel. No rebuttal can change that but one would hope some may sympathize, identify, or try to understand why our society causes people to have such emotions. That being said, I did identify with the offense taken when someone claims "blackness" When one who is neither woman or black says, "I'm a Strong Black Woman" they have a limited idea of what those words mean. These are strong black women: Maya Angelou, Grace Jones, Michelle Obama, Patti Label, India Arie, Angela Davis and some might even say Beyonce. They are strong black women because they are black and strong not because they have some quality that can be mimicked or recreated. My problem is the generalization of what it means to be black or woman (or more personally man). I also think it was a huge non-sequitur to make this about the transgendered community. This has NOTHING to do with being transgendered. There's a HUGE difference between claiming your gender and identifying with some aspect of a gender you are not. For instance if someone were to say, "I dance like Michael Jackson" I have a clear vision of what they mean. If someone says, "I dance like a black man" as a black person I find that offensive. Do you dance like Alvin Ailey, Gregory Hines, Savion Glover, or my brother who can't dance to save his life (sorry Antoine). Are those who don't dance like you somehow less "black"? Just writing this thinking about the completely different connotations one gets from "dance like a black man" and "dance like a black woman" may shed light on how gender plays into the conversation (on a side note Google Black dancer and see how the web stereotypes black dance) Being black goes beyond how I talk, dress, dance, look (especially black folk who don't fail the paper bag test) It is the culmination of all my experiences being black. True there are shared cultural experiences of any group of like people but those shared characteristics are merely common traits in the group and not defining. I am equally offended by the generalization of gender and sexuality. The idea that being gay is something you can see. That being gay has ANYTHING to do with how you walk, talk, dress, dance. How can you tell anyone is gay simply because they do not conform to gender roles that are archaic. I don't care how good your "gaydar" is there are men whose balance of masculinity/femininity do not correlate to their sexual attraction. There are also people (even men) who sexuality is not their most defining trait. I am especially hurt and offended when people talk about kids and their sexuality. It's horrible. How can a non sexual child be straight or homosexual? Sure he may have non-conforming traits but until he matures who knows he may also grow up to be transgendered, non gender conforming, an effeminate man or dare I say it might just be a phase. None of which has anything to do with sexuality or who you're attracted to. You would think gays would be supportive of this idea with the abundance of anti-feminism that perpetuates the community. (just visit any gay dating site and you'll see a plethora of the tags Masculine for Masculine and NoFems) So my summation... I am who I am as a result of my history and my life. Being black is something you can only claim if you are. Sure we can all identify with each others struggles but at the end of the day, you can't steal my culture because it's something beyond what you can fully comprehend. It's who I am.